1. The basics of seating order and how to sit in a room (reception room, meeting room, Japanese-style room)
So that you never freeze over "where should I have them sit," you learn the principle that the seat farthest from the door is the upper seat, and how to apply it to a reception room, a meeting room and a Japanese-style room.
Seating order, sekiji (席次), is the practice of deciding where people sit according to their standing at that occasion. It is not fixed by law; it is no more than a convention that makes visible the wish to raise the other person up. But precisely because it is a convention, doing the opposite in ignorance can be taken as "being made light of." The basis is just one thing: the seat farthest from the doorway is the upper seat, kamiza (上座), and the seat nearest the doorway is the lower seat, shimoza (下座), also called the end seat, masseki (末席). If you understand it as the idea that the farther a place is from unsettledness, people coming and going, noise from the corridor, a door suddenly opening, the higher it ranks, you can judge for yourself even in a room you have never been in.
In a reception room, the rank of the furniture is added to this. A sofa is regarded as higher than a single armchair, so in a reception set where a sofa faces armchairs, the sofa on the side farthest from the door is the highest seat of all. Within the same sofa, the side farther from the door is higher and the side nearer the door is lower. When you have shown a visitor in, indicate with your open palm and say "dozo oku e o-kake kudasai" (please take the seat farther in) so they sit there, while your own side sits on the side nearer the door. Tea, too, is served starting from the upper seat, the visitor side first and your own side after.
In a meeting room, the common arrangement is facing each other across a long table. The row farther from the door is the visitor side and the row nearer the door is your own side. As for rank within a row, one school treats the middle, closer to the chair's seat or the facilitator, as higher, while another goes by distance from the doorway. Since opinion divides here, follow the place cards or your workplace's own way if there are any. In a room with 2 doorways, use as your reference the main entrance that people actually use most. The best seat can also change with how the room is used, such as facing the projector or having a good view of the whiteboard, so if you are unsure, showing people to their seats with a reason attached, "this side has the better view, so please," avoids friction.
In a Japanese-style room, the reference is not distance from the door but the tokonoma (床の間), the alcove. The seat in front of the alcove, that is, with your back to it, is the upper seat, and the seat near the doorway with its sliding fusuma doors is the lower seat. This follows from the idea that the position backed by the hanging scroll and the flowers has the highest rank. It is considered correct form to sit on a floor cushion, zabuton (座布団), only after being invited to, and not to walk across a cushion standing or shift its position yourself. Note that sometimes you mean to sit in the lower seat and the other side presses the upper seat on you. Show reluctance once, and if they insist again, give your thanks and sit. Continuing to refuse damages the face of the host who meant to show hospitality, and departs from the purpose of seating order.
Seating order in a reception room (ranking when a sofa faces armchairs; 1 is the upper seat)
Rank
Position of the seat
Why it is settled that way
1
The far end of the sofa farthest from the door
Farthest from the door, and the sofa outranks the armchairs
2
The door-side end of the same sofa
Within the same piece of furniture, nearer the door is lower
3
The armchair on the side far from the door
The position is far in, but the furniture ranks below the sofa
4
The armchair nearest the door
The end seat by the traffic. Taken by the host showing people in, or by junior staff of your own company
The seat for the person of highest standing present. In principle the seat farthest from the doorway. In a Japanese-style room it is in front of the alcove, and at a round table too it is the seat farthest from the doorway.
lower seat, shimoza (下座), end seat, masseki (末席)
The seat nearest the doorway. It is taken by whoever has a role that involves moving: serving tea, relaying messages, settling the bill. The seat of junior staff, the organizer, or the host showing people in.
reception set
The reception-room furniture combining a sofa, single armchairs and a table. The sofa is regarded as higher-ranking than the armchairs.
alcove, tokonoma (床の間)
A part of the wall of a Japanese-style room raised one step, where a hanging scroll or flowers are displayed. The seat in front of it is the upper seat. In a Japanese-style room this is the reference for seating order.
the host showing people in
The side that leads visitors to the room, offers them seats and serves tea. As a rule they sit in the lower seat and take the position near the door and the traffic route.
practice, kanko (慣行)
A convention established by having been widely done, rather than by law or regulation. Seating order is one of these, and the details differ by industry and company.
Worked examples
2 visitors and 2 of your own people use the reception room. How do you seat them?
Answer and reasoning The 2 visitors on the sofa on the side farther from the door, the 2 of your own people on the side nearer the door. On both the visitor side and your own side, the more senior person sits farther from the door within each row. When showing them in, indicate with your open palm and say "dozo oku e o-kake kudasai."
You have shown a visitor into a meeting room with 2 doorways. Which do you use as the reference for the upper seat?
Answer and reasoning Use the main entrance that people actually use most, and treat the side far from it as the upper seat. If both are used about equally, think of the side farther from the corridor as the upper seat and show them in clearly with "kochira e dozo" (this way, please).
You were shown into a Japanese-style room with an alcove but entered before being offered a seat. What do you do?
Answer and reasoning The space in front of the alcove is the upper seat, so wait on the lower-seat side near the doorway until you are invited. Sit on the floor cushion only after being invited too. If the upper seat is offered, show reluctance once, and if they insist again, say "shitsurei itashimasu" and sit.
Sources and basis: ※ There is no public regulation on this. It is an organized summary of widely accepted business practice
2. Seating order in vehicles (taxi, private car, train, elevator)
Even in the same "car," the upper seat switches depending on who is holding the wheel. You learn the 4 cases, a taxi, a private car driven by the other person, a train and an elevator, each with its reason.
When the driver is a third party, a professional driver, as in a taxi or a chauffeured hire car, the upper seat is behind the driver's seat. It is the position where getting in and out is calmest and which is regarded as safest in the car. Next comes the seat behind the front passenger seat, then, if 3 people sit in the back, the middle, and the front passenger seat is the end seat. The front passenger seat is the end seat because whoever sits there tells the driver the destination, checks the route, settles the fare and takes the receipt. In other words "the hardest-working seat" is the end seat, and it makes sense once you see that it is decided by role rather than by the rank of the position itself.
This is exactly reversed in a private car driven by someone from the client or by your own superior. In that case the front passenger seat is the upper seat. This is because it is regarded as the passengers' courtesy not to leave the driver alone but to sit beside them and keep them company. If you carry the taxi rule of "behind the driver's seat is the upper seat" over to a private car, you end up treating the person driving for you as a chauffeur, which is rude instead. The dividing point is not the type of car or the distance, but the single question of whether the driver is a third party or the other party or someone of your own group.
On a train, the window seat facing the direction of travel is regarded as the upper seat. You can see the scenery, and there is less of the motion sickness that facing backwards tends to bring on. When using a row of 3 seats on a Shinkansen or the like, the window seat is highest, then the aisle seat, and the middle, squeezed between the two and the most cramped, is lowest. It is usual to take the aisle seat or the middle, with people passing by, yourself. Here too, though, if there is a reason such as wanting to stretch out or getting off partway, the person's own wish takes priority. Seating order is a means of hospitality, not the aim.
For an elevator, the reference is not position but the control panel. In front of the panel is the end seat, because that person has the job of pressing the destination floor, holding the doors open and watching people in and out. The back, especially the far side as seen from the panel, is the upper position. If the car arrives empty, the host showing people in gets in first, takes the panel and holds the doors open to receive the visitor. When getting out, the visitor goes first. Conversely, when several people are already aboard and there is no need to secure the panel, hold the door with your hand and let the visitor get in first. If you remember only the words "the visitor goes first" and apply them to both getting in and getting out, there is no one left to hold the doors, so remember it by why it is done.
Seating order in a taxi or hire car (when the driver is a third party; 1 is the upper seat)
Rank
Seat
The role of that seat
1
Behind the driver's seat
The most senior person. Getting in and out is calmest here
2
Behind the front passenger seat
The second seat. Gets in and out from the pavement side
3
The middle of the back seat
The lower position when 3 sit in the back. The most cramped seat
4
The front passenger seat
The end seat. Gives the destination and settles the fare
A car hired complete with a driver. Since the driver is a third party, just as with a taxi, the thinking on seating order is the same.
front passenger seat
The seat beside the driver. It is the end seat if the driver is a third party, but the upper seat in a private car driven by the other party or someone of your own group; the seat that reverses with the situation.
control panel
The panel inside an elevator with the floor buttons and the open and close buttons. The person standing in front of it takes on the operating, so that is the end position.
direction of travel
The direction the train is going. The window seat facing it is regarded as the upper seat and ranks above a seat with its back to it.
traffic route, dosen (動線)
The path along which people move. When judging seating order, you look at the relation to doorways and aisles because of the idea that the farther from this route, the more settled a place is.
Worked examples
You ride in a taxi with 3 people: a client's department manager, your own section chief and yourself. How do you sit?
Answer and reasoning The most senior person, the client's department manager, behind the driver's seat; your own section chief behind the front passenger seat; you in the front passenger seat. You tell the driver the destination and, on getting out, settle the fare and take the receipt.
Your superior and you ride in a car driven by the client's contact. How do you sit?
Answer and reasoning Since the driver is a person from the other party, the front passenger seat is the upper seat. Your superior takes the front passenger seat and you sit in the back. Showing your superior to the seat behind the driver on taxi instinct would treat the person driving for you as a chauffeur.
You ride an empty elevator with a visitor. Who goes first getting in and getting out?
Answer and reasoning Getting in, you go first, stand in front of the control panel and hold the doors. Getting out, the visitor goes first. If the visitor goes first both ways, there is no one to hold the doors.
Sources and basis: ※ There is no public regulation on this. It is an organized summary of widely accepted business practice
3. Showing people the way and seating order at a meal (corridors, stairs, banquets, round tables)
The thinking behind seating order continues in the time before and after people sit down. We cover walking in corridors and on stairs, the organizer's position at a banquet, and how the round table turns at a Chinese meal.
In a corridor, the middle is regarded as the higher position and the wall side as the lower. Have the visitor walk on the middle side, while the person showing them the way walks 2 or 3 steps ahead and to one side, indicating the direction. Walking directly behind gives no way to show the route, and standing directly in front and walking backwards is dangerous. At a corner, stop once, indicate the direction with your fingers held together and your palm open, and then turn. Avoid pointing with a single raised finger. Match your walking pace to the other person, and glancing back now and then to check the distance keeps you from leaving them behind.
As for stairs, explanations differ on whether the guide goes first or last going up, and what to do going down. Since opinion is divided, rather than insisting that one is correct, the practical thing is to give priority to safety and clarity. What can be said in every case is: have the visitor walk on the handrail side; before going up, tell them where you are going, as in "I will show you to the reception room on the 3rd floor"; and do not look down on them or press right up behind them. On narrow stairs, if you add "osaki ni shitsurei itashimasu" (excuse me for going ahead) and lead the way, the argument about order stops being an issue at all.
At a meal or a banquet, the reference does not change. In a tatami room, the seat in front of the alcove is the upper seat and belongs to the guest of honour, and the seat nearest the doorway is the lower seat and belongs to the organizer. The organizer sits in the lower seat because they move about to order, to get extra drinks, to deal with the restaurant staff and to settle the bill. The order of seating people is settled too: the other attendees sit after the guest of honour has taken their seat. Showing people where to leave coats and large bags first saves a scramble after they have sat down.
A Chinese round table is round and so easy to get confused about, but here too the seat farthest from the doorway is the guest of honour's, and the seat nearest the doorway is the host's, the person who invited everyone. The seat to the guest of honour's left is the 2nd seat and the one to their right the 3rd, and from there the ranking falls as the seats move alternately left and right away from the guest of honour. In Japan this follows the idea of "left is higher," though in international protocol and the Chinese style the right is sometimes higher, so follow the place cards or the host's directions if there are any. The revolving tray is generally turned clockwise starting from the guest of honour, and once you have served yourself, stop it where it is easy for the next person to reach. A standing buffet party has no seating order to speak of, but greetings to the guest of honour and to senior people are still needed, and any chairs set out should be thought of as for resting.
Seating order at a Chinese round table (ranking based on the doorway)
Rank
Position of the seat
1
The seat farthest from the doorway. The guest of honour sits here
2
To the guest of honour's left
3
To the guest of honour's right
4
Next along to the left of the 2nd seat. Seats move alternately left and right away from the guest of honour
Lowest
The seat nearest the doorway. The inviting side's host or the organizer sits here
The guest most to be raised up at that gathering. At a meal they are shown to the upper seat, and seating, greetings and the toast are all built starting from the guest of honour.
organizer, kanji (幹事)
The person who arranges and runs the gathering and handles the bill. They sit in the lower seat nearest the doorway so as to move about easily.
left is higher, sajoi (左上位)
The idea that between equals the left side is higher. It is why, at a round table, the seat to the guest of honour's left is the 2nd and the one to their right the 3rd. In international protocol and the Chinese style the right is sometimes higher.
revolving tray
The turning platform set in the middle of a round table. Turn it clockwise starting from the guest of honour, and once you have served yourself, stop it where it is easy for the next person to reach.
standing buffet style
A style where people eat, drink and talk standing rather than seated. There is no seating order, but greetings to the guest of honour and to senior people are not left out.
Worked examples
You are showing a visitor up the stairs to the reception room on the 3rd floor. What do you start with?
Answer and reasoning First tell them the destination: "I will show you to the reception room on the 3rd floor." Have the visitor walk on the handrail side, and if it is narrow, say "osaki ni shitsurei itashimasu" and lead. Rather than agonizing over whether to go first or last on the way up, it is more practical to state the destination and offer the safer side.
You are the organizer at a banquet in a tatami room. Where do you sit?
Answer and reasoning The lower seat nearest the doorway. You need to move about to order, to get extra drinks, to deal with the restaurant staff and to settle the bill. The space in front of the alcove is the guest of honour's seat, so you do not sit there.
The guest of honour at a round table has been decided. Where are the 2nd and 3rd seats?
Answer and reasoning The 2nd seat is to the guest of honour's left and the 3rd to their right. From there the ranking falls as the seats move alternately left and right away from the guest of honour, and the seat nearest the doorway is the host's, the person who invited everyone.
Sources and basis: ※ There is no public regulation on this. It is an organized summary of widely accepted business practice
Check quiz
Q1 | The rule for kamiza
Which is generally taken as the most basic idea about where the kamiza (上座), the seat of honour, is in a reception room?
The seat furthest from the door
The seat in the middle of the room
The seat nearest the door
The seat nearest the window
AnswerA. The seat furthest from the door
The basic rule is that the kamiza (上座) is the seat furthest from the door. The area near the door, unsettled by people coming and going, is the shimoza (下座). A seat near a window is not necessarily the kamiza; judge by distance from the door, not by the view. Treating the centre as the kamiza confuses this with the rule for walking along a corridor.
Q2 | The sofa set
You show a visitor into a reception room where a sofa faces armchairs. Which seat is it appropriate to offer?
The armchair on the side away from the door
The sofa on the side away from the door
The sofa on the side near the door
The armchair on the side near the door
AnswerB. The sofa on the side away from the door
In a reception suite the side away from the door is the kamiza, and a sofa ranks above a single armchair, so the sofa on the far side from the door is the highest seat. The side near the door is the shimoza where your own side sits, and offering an armchair deliberately lowers the rank of the seat given.
Q3 | Rows in a meeting room
For a meeting with an invited client you use a room where two rows face each other across a long table. Which seating is NOT appropriate?
Your own side sits after the visitors are seated
Ask the visitors to sit in the row near the door
Ask the visitors to sit in the row away from the door
Your own side sits in the row near the door
AnswerB. Ask the visitors to sit in the row near the door
The row near the door is the shimoza, so offering it to visitors is inappropriate. Visitors take the row away from the door and your own side the near row, handling arrivals and comings and goings. Ranking within a row follows either the "nearer the centre is higher" convention or the "further from the door is higher" one, so follow your employer's practice.
Q4 | What the lowest seat is
Which is an appropriate description of the shimoza (下座), also called masseki (末席), the lowest seat?
The seat deepest in the room, furthest from the door
The seat with the best view in the room
The seat nearest the door, easy to move from for serving and errands
The seat directly opposite the most senior person
AnswerC. The seat nearest the door, easy to move from for serving and errands
The shimoza (下座) is the seat nearest the door, positioned so you can move easily to serve tea or announce arrivals. The seat deepest in the room is the kamiza, so calling that the lowest seat gets the ranking backwards. Sitting opposite someone, or having a view, is not a ranking criterion.
Q5 | Kamiza in a tatami room
In a Japanese-style room with a tokonoma (床の間), the decorative alcove, which position is the kamiza?
In front of the tokonoma, with your back to it
The seat closest to the engawa veranda
The seat closest to the fusuma sliding door that serves as the entrance
The seat furthest from the tokonoma
AnswerA. In front of the tokonoma, with your back to it
In a Japanese-style room the tokonoma (床の間) is the reference point, and the kamiza is in front of it — that is, with your back to it. Seats near the entrance, such as the fusuma, are the shimoza. Reading "in front of the tokonoma" as "where you can admire the tokonoma" and picking the far seat is a common mix-up.
Q6 | The floor cushion
Which is NOT appropriate on being shown into a Japanese-style room?
Walk across the zabuton standing up to move further into the room
Do not shift the zabuton yourself or turn it over
On entering, wait on the side near the entrance until you are invited further in
Sit on the zabuton (座布団), the floor cushion, only when invited to
AnswerA. Walk across the zabuton standing up to move further into the room
Treading on a zabuton (座布団) is considered bad manners; move on your knees instead to avoid it. Sitting only when invited, not moving it yourself, and waiting in the lower position until invited are all in line with ordinary etiquette.
Q7 | Two doorways
Which is the appropriate way to judge the kamiza in a meeting room with two doorways?
Treat the seat exactly midway between the two doorways as the kamiza
Treat the seat equidistant from both doorways as the kamiza
In a room with more than one doorway, do not think about seating order
Take the doorway people mainly use as the reference and treat the seat furthest from it as the kamiza
AnswerD. Take the doorway people mainly use as the reference and treat the seat furthest from it as the kamiza
With more than one doorway, take the main entrance people actually use as the reference and treat the seat furthest from it as the kamiza. There is no rule making an equidistant or midway seat the kamiza, and having two doorways does not abolish seating order.
Q8 | Being urged to take it
At a client's office you go to sit in the shimoza, but your host presses the kamiza on you. Which response is appropriate?
Explain the seating rule to them and stay in the lower seat throughout
Demur once, and if they insist, thank them and sit
Sit in neither seat and start talking standing up
Say nothing and move straight to the kamiza as soon as it is offered
AnswerB. Demur once, and if they insist, thank them and sit
Seating order is a convention for elevating the other person, so refusing repeatedly makes a host who is trying to be hospitable lose face, defeating the purpose. Demurring once and then, when pressed again, saying 「失礼いたします」 and sitting is the balanced course. Insisting on explaining the rule confuses the means with the end.
Q9 | Visiting with your manager
You visit a client with your manager and are shown into the reception room. Which is NOT appropriate?
You take the seat furthest from the door and offer your manager the seat on the door side
Stay standing until the host invites you to sit
Put your bag on the floor at your feet rather than on the chair or the table
Have your manager sit on the far side from the door and sit next to them
AnswerA. You take the seat furthest from the door and offer your manager the seat on the door side
There is a ranking within the visiting side too: in the row you are shown to, your manager takes the seat furthest from the door and you sit next to them. You taking the far seat reverses the order. Sitting only when invited and keeping your bag at your feet are both fine.
Q10 | Place cards are set out
Place cards have been laid at each seat in the meeting room. Which seating is appropriate?
Place cards are only a guide, so give priority to the kamiza rule and re-seat yourself
Move your own place card towards the lower end before sitting
Whoever arrives first sits where they like
Sit as the place cards indicate
AnswerD. Sit as the place cards indicate
Place cards are set out by the organiser with a purpose and take priority over the kamiza rule. The rule is only a guide for when there are no cards or directions. Moving a card disrupts the arrangement for everyone else too.
Q11 | Reading a seating chart
A seating chart numbers the seats 1, 2, 3, 4 in order of distance from the door, furthest first. Which describes a seat with a higher number?
A visitor always sits in a high-numbered seat
The higher the number, the lower the rank, and the closer to the door
The higher the number, the higher the rank, and the further from the door
The numbers show the order of sitting down and have nothing to do with rank
AnswerB. The higher the number, the lower the rank, and the closer to the door
1 is the kamiza; as the numbers rise the rank falls and the seat comes closer to the door. Reading the number as "degree of seniority" inverts the meaning. Visitors sit in the kamiza, that is, the low-numbered seats.
Q12 | In a taxi
When 4 people ride in a taxi, which seat is the kamiza?
Behind the driver
Behind the front passenger seat
The front passenger seat
The middle of the back seat
AnswerA. Behind the driver
Because the driver is a professional third party, the kamiza is the seat behind the driver. It allows unhurried getting in and out and is regarded as the safest position in the car. The front passenger seat is the lowest seat, giving the destination and settling the fare; treating it as the kamiza imports the rule for a private car.
Q13 | The lowest seat's job
Travelling by chauffeured hire car, which combination of the lowest seat and the job of the person in it is appropriate?
The middle of the back seat; handles opening and closing the door
The front passenger seat; gives the destination and settles the fare
Behind the driver; gives the destination and settles the fare
Behind the front passenger seat; settles the fare and takes the receipt
AnswerB. The front passenger seat; gives the destination and settles the fare
In a car driven by a third party the front passenger seat is the lowest: that person gives the driver the destination, settles the fare and takes the receipt. Behind the driver is the kamiza, so that person does not take on these jobs. The middle of the back seat is also a lower seat, but it is not the one that settles the fare.
Q14 | When they are driving
A client's own staff member is driving and gives you a lift. Which seating is generally appropriate?
Anyone may sit anywhere they like
The middle of the back seat is the kamiza
Behind the driver is the kamiza
The front passenger seat is the kamiza
AnswerD. The front passenger seat is the kamiza
In a private car driven by someone from the other party, the front passenger seat is the kamiza, out of consideration for not leaving the driver on their own. Transferring the taxi rule of "behind the driver is the kamiza" would treat the person kindly driving you as a chauffeur, which is rude.
Q15 | What makes the difference
Which correctly describes what decides where the kamiza is in a car?
It changes according to whether the vehicle is large or small
How the front passenger seat is treated changes depending on whether a third party is driving or the other party or one of your own people is
The kamiza changes with the length of the journey
With 3 or fewer passengers, seating order is not considered
AnswerB. How the front passenger seat is treated changes depending on whether a third party is driving or the other party or one of your own people is
In a taxi or hire car driven by a professional, the front passenger seat is the lowest; in a private car driven by the other party or by one of your own people, it is the kamiza. Who is at the wheel is what makes the difference, not the size of the vehicle, the distance or the number of passengers.
Q16 | In front of the panel
Which position in a lift is regarded as the masseki (末席), the shimoza (下座) or lowest position?
Around the middle of the car
In front of the control panel
The back, furthest from the doors
The far side as seen from the control panel
AnswerB. In front of the control panel
In front of the control panel is the lowest position because that person presses the floor buttons, holds the doors and watches people in and out. The back, furthest from the doors, is the kamiza; calling that the lowest position gets the ranking backwards.
Q17 | A row of three
When 3 people use a row of 3 seats on the Shinkansen, which seat is generally the lowest?
The aisle seat
The window seat
The seat nearest the vestibule
The middle seat
AnswerD. The middle seat
In a row of 3, the window seat ranks highest, then the aisle seat, and the middle seat — hemmed in on both sides and the most cramped — is the lowest. The aisle seat is easy to get in and out of but has people passing. Where you are in the carriage is a separate question from ranking within the row of 3.
Q18 | Three in the car
A client's contact is driving their own car and gives a lift to you and your manager — the two of you. Which seating is generally appropriate?
You take the front passenger seat and your manager sits in the middle of the back
Both you and your manager sit on either side of the back seat
Your manager sits behind the driver and you take the front passenger seat
Your manager takes the front passenger seat and you sit in the back
AnswerD. Your manager takes the front passenger seat and you sit in the back
In a car the other party drives themselves, the front passenger seat next to the driver is the kamiza, because it is the position that keeps the driver company — the reverse of a chauffeured car, where that seat is the lowest. So the senior person, your manager, takes the front passenger seat. The middle of the back seat is the most cramped, lowest seat in any situation.
Q19 | Seats on a train
On a train with facing seats for 4, which seat is generally the kamiza?
The window seat with your back to the direction of travel
The window seat facing the direction of travel
The aisle seat with your back to the direction of travel
The aisle seat facing the direction of travel
AnswerB. The window seat facing the direction of travel
The window seat facing the direction of travel is the kamiza: you get the view, and there is less of the motion sickness that riding backwards tends to bring on. Aisle seats have people passing and so do not rank highest, and there is no reason to make a backward-facing seat the kamiza.
Q20 | What comes before the rule
Which is NOT an appropriate way to think about seating order?
A senior person with a bad leg should still be seated in the innermost seat, as the rule requires
You may offer a seat that is easy to get in and out of
Where the person themselves asks for a particular seat, that preference comes first
Sitting where you are invited to sit can be what courtesy requires in the end
AnswerA. A senior person with a bad leg should still be seated in the innermost seat, as the rule requires
Seating order is a means of hospitality, so where someone has a bad leg or is prone to travel sickness, offering the seat that is easy to get in and out of better serves its purpose. Applying the rule mechanically and forcing inconvenience on someone puts the means above the end.
Q21 | Three in a taxi
3 of you take a taxi: 2 in the back seat and 1 in the front passenger seat. Which arrangement is appropriate?
Most senior in the front passenger seat, next behind the driver, most junior behind the front passenger seat
Most senior behind the front passenger seat, next behind the driver, most junior in the front passenger seat
Most senior behind the driver, next behind the front passenger seat, most junior in the front passenger seat
Most senior behind the driver, next in the front passenger seat, most junior behind the front passenger seat
AnswerC. Most senior behind the driver, next behind the front passenger seat, most junior in the front passenger seat
In a taxi, behind the driver is the kamiza (上座), the seat of honour; behind the front passenger seat is second; the front passenger seat is the lowest. Putting the front passenger seat high imports into a taxi the rule for a private car the other party drives. There is also no basis for making the seat behind the front passenger seat the highest.
Q22 | A senior arriving late
At a dinner, you know a senior person will arrive after the start time. How should the seating be handled?
Have everyone stand and wait until they arrive
Give the late arrival a lower seat
Leave their seat as the seating order dictates and show them to it when they arrive
Have people fill in from the kamiza end in order of arrival
AnswerC. Leave their seat as the seating order dictates and show them to it when they arrive
Seating order follows position, not who arrives early or late. Leaving the seat free means the person can sit straight down on arrival. Filling in from the top forces people to move again and disrupts the room more, not less.
Q23 | When you cannot tell
You are shown into the reception room at a company you are visiting for the first time and cannot tell which seat is the kamiza. What is the appropriate response?
Sit where you are directed; if nobody directs you, wait in the seat near the door
Sit nowhere and keep standing until your host arrives
Pick the seat you judge to be the kamiza and sit there to wait
Ask your manager in a loud voice which seat you should take
AnswerA. Sit where you are directed; if nobody directs you, wait in the seat near the door
The visiting side follows the host's direction. Where there is none, waiting in the shimoza (下座) near the door leaves you free to move if the kamiza is offered afterwards. Remaining on your feet obliges the host to fuss over you, and a loud exchange in the reception room is best avoided.
Q24 | The organiser's seat
Which is NOT appropriate about where to sit when you are the organiser of a dinner?
Sit where it is easy to catch the staff's attention
Show the guest of honour to the seat in front of the tokonoma (床の間)
Sit in the seat nearest the door
Sit in the seat with your back to the tokonoma (床の間)
AnswerD. Sit in the seat with your back to the tokonoma (床の間)
The tokonoma (床の間) is the decorative alcove, and the seat with its back to it is the kamiza and belongs to the guest of honour, so it is not for the organiser. The organiser moves about to order, settle the bill and deal with the staff, so they take the shimoza nearest the door.
Q25 | Seating the guest of honour
Which is NOT appropriate when showing the guest of honour to their seat at a dinner?
Have the other guests sit once the guest of honour is seated
Offer the guest of honour the seat nearest the door
Show them first to where coats and bags can be left
Offer the guest of honour the seat in front of the tokonoma
AnswerB. Offer the guest of honour the seat nearest the door
The seat nearest the door is the shimoza, so it is not offered to the guest of honour. In front of the tokonoma is the kamiza, and the order is for the other guests to sit once the guest of honour has. Pointing out where to leave belongings first is a practical courtesy.
Q26 | Round table, guest of honour
Which is appropriate for seating at a round table for a Chinese meal?
The guest of honour takes the seat furthest from the door and the host the seat nearest it
At a round table, position relative to the door is not considered
The host takes the seat furthest from the door and the guest of honour the seat nearest it
The host and the guest of honour sit side by side on the side furthest from the door
AnswerA. The guest of honour takes the seat furthest from the door and the host the seat nearest it
At a round table too, the seat furthest from the door is the kamiza and belongs to the guest of honour, while the seat nearest the door is the host's. The host taking the kamiza confuses who is inviting and who is invited. Being round does not mean there is no reference point.
Q27 | The lazy Susan
Which is appropriate for the revolving tray on a Chinese round table?
Turn it clockwise starting from the guest of honour, and stop it where the next person can reach
Whoever notices first may turn it whichever way they like
The tray is decorative, so do not turn it and have the staff serve the food out
Once you have taken your portion, spin it hard, glasses and all
AnswerA. Turn it clockwise starting from the guest of honour, and stop it where the next person can reach
The usual practice is to turn the tray clockwise starting from the guest of honour, and once you have served yourself, stop it where the next person can reach. Turning it the other way disrupts the order, and spinning it hard hits the glasses on the table or someone mid-serving. Guests serve themselves as a rule.
Q28 | Standing receptions
Which is NOT appropriate behaviour at a standing reception?
Do not stay in one spot; talk with several people
Since there is no seated order of precedence, greetings to the guest of honour may be skipped
Treat any chairs provided as being for resting
Watch where you stand so that people do not bunch up around the guest of honour and senior figures
AnswerB. Since there is no seated order of precedence, greetings to the guest of honour may be skipped
A standing reception has no seated order of precedence, but that does not remove the need to greet the guest of honour and senior figures. Chairs there are for resting, not markers of precedence. Circulating rather than staying put is what the format is for.
Q29 | The point of seating order
Which is an appropriate explanation of why seating order is observed?
Because the order of seats is laid down by law
To convey deference to the other person in a form they cannot misread
Because where you sit determines your share of the cost
Because where you sit determines how many times you may speak
AnswerB. To convey deference to the other person in a form they cannot misread
Seating order is a convention that makes respect visible; it is neither law nor company rule. It has no function in dividing costs or allotting speaking turns. The details differ by industry and company, so follow your employer's practice where there is one.
Q30 | Exception to the rule
In which situation does applying the rule "the kamiza is the seat furthest from the door" as it stands tend to go wrong?
Walking a visitor along a corridor to the room they are going to
Riding in a car driven by someone from the other party
Hosting a client in your own reception room
Holding a meeting in your own meeting room
AnswerB. Riding in a car driven by someone from the other party
In a private car the other party drives, the front passenger seat is the kamiza, so neither the distance-from-the-door rule nor the taxi rule of "behind the driver is the kamiza" carries over. Reception rooms and meeting rooms follow the rule (far side from the door), and in a corridor the centre is the higher position — also as the rule has it.
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